Baby Stuff: Revisited

I know I posted a baby gear manifesto a long time ago, while I only had one child.  Now that I have two, and know friends that are having their first children, I figured it was time to update the old lists, which seem to have the worst formatting in blogging history (for what reason, I cannot begin to understand!?).

General Gear:
     1. Baby Carrier:   I have loved my ErgoBaby carrier; we got it when Liam was about a year old, but we use it all the time at the zoo, grocery store, mall, parties, etc.  The ergo is developmentally sound for the baby's spine because it offers more complete support under the baby's bottom; it is also great for mama's back because it moves the child's weight to your hips instead of your upper back.  I hear you can also nurse in the ErgoBaby, but I had already weaned Liam when we got it.  Dominic rides in it occasionally at almost 4 years old.  I loved my ZoloWear ring sling with Dominic (while he was the only child), but struggled with it when I had Liam because I worried he'd fall out while I was bending over to help Dominic.

     2. Sleeping:  I was an adamant non-co-sleeper before I was an exhausted new mom.  Once sense and exhaustion kicked in, we tended to co-sleep for ease of nursing at night - roll over, boob in mouth, back to sleep (repeat all night).  At the times I wanted my own space for sleeping or for daytime baby naps, we really liked our Amby Baby Motion Bed (the baby hammock), as pre-rolling babies were quickly soothed back to sleep if they stirred in the night.  Around 6 months with both of our boys (when the outgrew the Amby), we moved them to a floor bed (short IKEA mattress on the floor) in a thoroughly baby-proofed room down the hall - if an Amby is out of the budget or too weird looking, I highly recommend skipping the crib and using a floor bed from the start.

     3.1. Stroller (and a little about carseats):  DO NOT GET A TRAVEL SYSTEM.  I HATED MY TRAVEL SYSTEM STROLLER.  IT WAS WAY WAY WAY TOO HEAVY AND CUMBERSOME, and there are much better options available.  I wish I'd registered for something like a Phil and Teds stroller that can convert to a double when/if more children come along.  They are an expensive initial investment, but this would have been awesome to have when child two came along and there wasn't a baby shower to be seen.  You can buy a carseat converter if you like to keep your baby in the infant seat (which I didn't do with the second child... bizarre).  What we used and liked: Maxi Cosi infant seat and Pearle Stroller - it is a stroller the size of an umbrella stroller, that has clips to hold your carseat in it.  It is basically a compact make-your-own travel system that takes up a tiny fraction of your trunk space and is super easy to travel with.  A free hand-me-down double stroller that is way too heavy and takes up our whole trunk (did I mention free? priorities shift with child 2).
     3.2. Carseat:  As a first-time mom, I tended to leave Dominic in his infant carseat when we went grocery shopping, to the mall, to a restaurant, etc.  That is the whole appeal of an infant carseat, after all.  When my second came along, I rarely kept him in his infant seat to take him out of the car.  If I had a do-over, I'd probably just invest in an awesome (Brittax?) convertible carseat that will last from newborn through 18-years-old (or whatever the current carseat law requires).

     4. High Chair:  do not waste money on an expensive cushy one.  We LOVED our $20 IKEA Antilop high chair - you can hose it off on a bad day, wipe it with a sponge quickly on a good day, and easily take the legs out to fit it on the floorboard below your child in the backseat for a road trip to grandma's.  You can buy a $5 pad for it for when a baby first starts sitting up.  If money is no object, I would recommend a Stokke Trip Trap Chair or Svan High Chair, which convert to independent toddler chairs and on to an adult chairs as your child grows (another expensive initial investment that would be worth it long-term).

     5. Play Mats:  we really liked the easy cleaning and compact/simple storage of the IKEA play mats... they were also inexpensive compared to the ones that light up and "teach your infant spanish and long division"... a topic for another post another day.

     6. Changing Table:  we used a changing pad on top of a dresser, and liked having at least 2 covers so one could be washed while the other one was getting pooped on.  Ha!  When our children started rolling a lot, we just stowed the pad behind the bathroom door, and laid it on the floor to change them.

     7. Baby Spoons:  the plastic Munchkin brand spoons you can buy at the grocery store or Target hold baby food better than the standard rubber coated baby spoons.

     8.  Wipe Warmer:  used it with Dominic, could care less about warm wipes when Liam came along.

     9.  Diaper Bag:  we LOVE our black Columbia messenger-style diaper bag.  The key for us was unisex because Ryan is often out with the boys alone and doesn't want to carry a quilted pink paisley diaper bag that looks like a purse.  When we no longer need it for diapers, it will be a great multi-purpose messenger bag.

For nursing mamas:
     1. Breast Pump - thought I didn't want one with my first, ended up wishing I'd had one from day one!  I loved my manual Medela Harmony pump initially, but then I needed to pump hands-free, so I got the Medela Freestyle pump and had no complaints.  They make excellent pumps.

     2. Nursing Bras - get fitted at a maternity store (Motherhood Maternity had a TON of options) and buy several of these!  I preferred the ones that clipped open/closed on the strap near the collar bone (as opposed to opening in the front middle).  I didn't find any I liked while nursing Dominic so I only wore nursing tanktops, and looking back at pictures, I regret this decision... saggy... enough said.

     3. Nursing Tanktops - if you aren't big on supportive bras, buy one in every color, otherwise, these are great for lounging around at home or wearing under cardigans for easy nursing access while out and about.

     4. Gerber Prefold Diapers - Use these as burp cloths.  They are super absorbent for spitup and leaky boobs.  A dear friend suggested folding one up and putting it horizontally across my chest inside of my bra to manage leakage while at home or at night (best suggestion EVER).

     5. Bottles: we liked Dr. Brown's with child 1, by child 2 we didn't want to wash that many pieces each time we used a bottle and opted for the Playtex (?) ones that just had a few easily washed parts.

Montessori Mama!

With my training fast approaching, school ending yesterday and a whole year off, I've been thinking about nothing but Montessori. The home environment should be a place for the child to explore and grow in every developmental area within a safe and nurturing environment. There should be opportunities for practical work, sensorial exploration, language development, growth of his mathematical mind, and most importantly development of independence and confidence. Here is what we are up to in our Montessori home environment:

Floor bed: Dominic has given up the fight against bedtime, and for months now has had a beautiful bedtime routine. He takes a bath, gets into his PJs, reads a book (with our help of course), and goes to sleep. We've cut bottles out of the equation, but he does get 1/2 cup of warm milk in a sippy cup on nights that he is struggling to go down (not so Montessori... can we call it "following the child?")

Eating: This has been a BATTLE at home. At the Smith's house, his NaNa can feed him just about anything, but he has become increasingly difficult at home. So I had a conversation with Ms. Jacinta the other day, heard all about her fabulous little Montessori wonder of a granddaughter, and I had an epiphany. We were eating all kinds of things, and offering him other stuff (because we've been kind of junky eaters lately). So today I put exactly what I was eating on his plate (making sure it was healthy, and even adding cooked carrots to my own diet), and he ate every bite (except the ones that missed his mouth and ended up on the floor). I also offered him a tiny toddler sized fork that looks just like regular adult flatware, and that was a huge deal for him... he LOVED it.

After the meal he cleared his dishes, with me carrying him to the sink, he scrubbed them with the brush while I held them in the sink, propping him on my knee, and he then put them into the dishwasher on his own. I then let him wipe his own tray with a towel (why were we not doing this sooner?!). OH and midway through the meal I offered him a juice glass (mini version of my glass) and showed him how to use two hands to lift it to drink, and he went to town. Gradually tipping it more as he was more comfortable. When he started to put his hands into the cup, I took it. I would quickly return it as he begged for it, and he continued just the right way. It was PRECIOUS! Again, why weren't we doing this sooner?

Playing: His room still has one low shelf unit with three levels of shelves. The bottom shelf has an assortment of musical percussion instruments and a natural snake pull-toy (from Plan Toys). The second shelf has a tray of balls, a set of nesting cups (which are about to be rotated out as he's lost interest), and three turtles who are propelled by the balls that make their shells and feet. The top shelf has his pounding bench, which he is now able to fully manipulate, flipping the pegs as he finishes hammering them, and placing them in the correct shaped cutout. There is a basket of books on the top shelf, which he regularly visits, bringing us one book to read, returning it to the basket, and bringing another... OVER AND OVER again. There is also a xylophone representing the diatonic scale of C. He LOVES to play the xylophone, and I was so glad to find one that had the true scale.

He also has a set of toddler sized broom, mop, dust mop, and dust pan, that he has enjoyed test-driving. There is a shelf of stuffed animals in the closet, and a family of elephants on his rug by his rocking chair. He enjoys picking up a stuffed animal and carrying it around, or snuggling it. Lately he's been practicing differentiating the elephant family, today carrying the mother elephant on his shoulders like Ryan carries him around.

Generally we help him to play with only one toy at a time, reminding him to clean up as he begins to move on to the next. There is a large supply of other toys on a high shelf in the closet, so we can rotate the toys as he loses interest or gains interest. Keeping the shelf organized, with each toy returning to the exact same spot every time has aided his development of an orientation to his space and his sense of order. He knows exactly where things belong, and can help when they are out of place.

Our favorite activity is definitely listening to music and dancing with him. He LOVES music, of any kind of music, and has really taken to dancing. He particularly enjoys funk and techno along with harder rock while he's with his dad.

Furniture: The floor bed is kind of the focal point of the room (the thing everyone wrinkles their nose at when they see his room). Next to his bed is a toddler sized upholstered rocking chair that I salvaged from the roadside and slip-covered (so it is totally machine washable now). His clothes and cloth diapers are in a dresser near his closet, and we will start offering him a couple choices a day when we get a little closet shelf to place those options on. The changing table has been out of his room for a few months now because he enjoys acrobatic diaper changes, and we've gone to the changing pad on the floor method, which works well. He has a small basket for a laundry hamper and delights in putting his dirty clothes in it. I still have my rocking chair in his room because we do occasionally rock with him, and we sometimes like to sit in a chair while we are with him in his room.

Decorations: This area is a little bit lacking (still). I have added a series of black and white African animal photos above his shelf at his eye level. I also framed three 5x7 art-show postcards from a local artist that feature abstract paintings in different color families above his laundry hamper. He often takes them down for a closer look, which is totally safe because they are framed in cheap IKEA frames with plastic "glass fronts." He also has a lamp on his shelf that we use when he is winding down.

Toileting: recently he has shown an interest in his little toilet. It is a cheap one from IKEA, and he generally sits on it backward, but he does have an interest. He is also becoming proficient at signing and saying "poop" when he has one in his diaper... we're working on getting a little warning for that one! As long as he has an interest we will let him sit on his toilet in the restroom while we give him all of the "potty language" we will be using: pee, poop, toilet, clean, dry, diaper, etc. Our goal is not early potty training, but rather to help him communicate with us when he has that need and offer the little toilet as often as he is interested. He doesn't seem to have an aversion to wetness yet, despite being in cloth diapers for the past several months.

Outdoor exploration: Our back yard is an open area for exploration at this point. He plays with sticks and rocks he finds on the ground, often enjoys climbing over garden barriers and examining the trees. He also enjoys going to the park and climbing the play structures and swinging. Over the weekend we discovered that he enjoys swinging in a regular child swing (as opposed to the infant/toddler swings). The one at my parents' house is low enough to the ground that he could almost get into it on his own, and we stayed with him any time he was swinging.

Things to come: I will be adding to his room a small kitchen mat in a basket that he can use to delineate a workspace, as his toys become more complex, and as the number of peices increase.

In the area of decoration, I would like to have some family photos printed and hung at his level throughout the house and in the hallway. I want to sew some curtains for his window and a curtain for his closet. His room also needs a full length mirror (his length) and a table and chair for dressing and grooming and working. I just found out my neighbor is a woodworking hobbyist, so maybe he can help out in this arena... I think some homemade bread is in order!

Outside I would like to begin a garden with him, so he can harvest himself a little snack when he is outside and taste herbs. It would also be great for digging and watering. I will probably be buying a kiddie pool to keep back there for the summer (which lasts approximately 7 months in Houston). I want to paint the mini adirondack chair we have for him to relax. I would like to add an outdoor shelf to put some garden tools and watering can.

In the kitchen I would like to start some basic cooking with him. Maybe I'll pull in a low table so we can do projects down low (and I'm going to scout craigslist for a learning tower, to get him up to counter height). We'll try some breads and maybe some sauces or dips for veggies and crackers.

For art, I would like to invest in some high quality "block" crayons, since he is not ready for a pencil grip these allow him to hold on with his whole hand and are thick rectangular prisms that seem pretty difficult to break (I had a dream that they were super cheap at walmart, but that is indeed only a dream). I would also like to reconstitute some of my clay from the garage and pull out my wooden tools and ribs for him to play around with some ceramics... never to be glazed (unless i can find a friend with a kiln... Vindictive Pottery or Anne the Potter, maybe?) I would also like to purchase some art prints and frame some that I already have at his level around the house, probably on a rotating basis. As Maria would say "the best for the smallest among us!"

I'm also wanting to situate the communal areas to accommodate Dominic. Right now we have gates up blocking the living space off from the hallway because we don't want him to have open access to the kitchen and living room (lots of breakables and electronics... oh and gas stoves), but I would like to have a little nook for him in each of these spaces so he can feel more at home. This includes getting the learning tower and possibly investing in one of those expensive Svan high chairs so he can climb right up to the table (since he is quite the monkey). I also want to find some nice toddler chairs on the cheap (like the Michael Olaf option). Another idea is creating a playroom in our in-progress guest room.

So that is the current status... we will also be making some changes to welcome baby brother to the homestead... so we are guaranteed to be derailed from many of these projects and pick up others along the way. What are you guys up to on the homefront? Any tips for getting it more accessible for toddlers? Know where to find any of the "wishlist" items for cheap? Know how to insert photos in these dang posts? Help? I hope you are all well, and would love to hear what you are up to!

Pregnancy, Babies, and Gear, OH MY! Part 2: Gear

Gear Recommendations:

Sling/Carrier:

• ZoloWear Sling: a ring sling that is super easy to adjust, wash, and carry. Easy and discreet for nursing newborns in public, useful even at 11 months for Dominic (we use it when we take him to Mass, and I sometimes walk with him around the block in it). Pretty much any ring sling will work this way, but I recommend finding one (like the Zolo) that has a zipper pouch for 1 diaper, wipes, keys, and cell while you're out and about.

• 5 Yards of Jersey Cotton from the Fabric Store: Use it like the Sleepy Wrap or the Moby Wrap, and get two for the price of one when you cut it in half. Share one with your friend who just had a baby. This option divides the weight on both shoulders, so it is easier on the back. I was able to nurse Dominic as a newborn in this one sometimes (hit or miss) and it was tricky to get him into it when he was wailing to eat. This one is nice for carrying forward facing after 4-6 months, carrying on your back, or carrying mom-facing. It is much more tricky to get the baby in and out of, especially if you are also trying to worry about a diaper bag or shopping bags.

Bed:

• Amby Baby: pretty expensive "cocoon sleeper," suspended by a spring, so when baby wakes or stirs in the night, it gently rocks according to baby's movements. Dominic slept through the night around 2 months in this... very comfy for him. He outgrew it around 6 months when he was ready to sleep on his tummy on his floor bed. We bought ours on craigslist for less than half the retail price, and very gently used. They've been recalled, and they promise a fix, so keep an eye out for that.

• Montessori Floor Bed:basically an IKEA 3-part twin mattress on the floor in a totally baby-safe room. This concept allows for the most freedom of movement and independence for infants. We like that when Dominic wakes up he can play in his room happily right when he wakes up (no fussing to get him out of a crib). A challenge has been that we didn't start a good bedtime routine early, so when he became mobile he would crawl off and become fussy from being so tired and wound up. It took a lot of will power to stick with it, and it is getting to a point that we can leave the room with him awake but drowsy and he goes to sleep on his own. An added bonus is that he will sometimes crawl over to it and fall asleep on it completely unprompted, while he is playing independently in his room (with me down the very short hall on the computer).

Carseat/Stroller:

• Maxi Cosi Mico Infant Carrier: releasing this from the base is a little trickier than the Graco or Chicco. The seat is very comfy for the baby, and the design is very mod. Canopy/sunshade only extends half-way, which is a bummer sometimes.

For a travel system we used it with:

• Maxi Cosi Pearle Stroller: an Umbrella style stroller that also adapts to hold the infant carrier. This is a one shop stroller that is infinitely smaller than the typical "travel system." Easy to maneuver while shopping or out in pedestrian areas (Rice Village, Galleria, Airports, you name it, we've maneuvered this there!) This is ultra-compact for storing in the car or house (or apartment).

We loved this system for traveling with a 7 month old (that's why we switched to it, actually). Dominic was small enough for the infant carrier, but the other travel system was too bulky/heavy to maneuver easily through an airport (with luggage) while also stowing under the plane easily. This and the carseat both fit into the same travel stroller bag (made for the larger travel system strollers only... so it is one less case to store if you will be flying with a baby).

Other Carseats/Strollers we tried:

• Graco Snug Rider Infant Carrier: pretty comfy carseat for infants, easily removable/washable cover, full range sun sheild/canopy (very nice!). Handle a bit uncomfortable if carrying hooked over your elbow... only one side is rounded, the other has an uncomfortable edge, which was totally lame when out and about.
• Baby Trend Snap'n'go Stroller: lightweight stroller frame specifically for use with infant carriers; it does not have a seat, so it is pretty much finished when the child outgrows the infant seat (around 20-23 lbs). Much easier to maneuver in tight spaces than a travel system stroller, and much simpler to load/unload from the car. When folded it takes up half the space of a typical travel system stroller, takes up twice the space of the Maxi Cosi Pearle, but weighs about half as much as either of the other strollers.
• Graco Metrolite Stroller: the lightest of the big travel system strollers (that we found, anyway), though it is still quite cumbersome. It was really bulky, despite its smaller size, and too big for tight maneuvering (like shopping at a mall, IKEA, or on tight sidewalks). We quickly ditched this, although it may be a nice stroller for older children if you are interested in a big stroller for outings at grassy parks or on rough terrain? I just can't see myself having enough trunk space for it, even if it is a little more cushy for the baby! The storage under the seat was easy to get to, the shade was nice, and the handle was adjustable, if you are looking for this type of big stroller.

High Chair:

• IKEA Antilop: The least expensive high chair option on the market ($20, or $25 with tray), the most compact/collapsible, and the most practical. Completely made of plastic and metal legs, this is the most parent friendly high chair. It is totally wipe-able, there is no padding or crevices to trap crumbs or splatters. It has a detachable tray, or it can be used pulled up to a table. Cushions can be purchased separately and are machine wash/dry-able; the cushion makes the fit a little better for smaller babies or those who are just learning to sit independently. My parents got this one as a spare for Dominic to use, and now it is Riley's high chair, and they are going to be donating their $200-300 high chair to Project Gabriel because this one is so good. It renders pricey Peg Perego highchairs obsolete! I even saw it in a parenting magazine as the top pick. Today we wiped some week-old goo off of this thing without any scrubbing... heaven!

• IKEA Spolling: This is the first highchair we bought for our house because it folds flat (to fit against the wall in a tight space). It does not have a tray, and it is made of a wipeable or machine washable fabric seat on a metal folding frame. This one is really cute and has a handy pocket on the back, but the lack of tray and crevices in the fabric make it more difficult to manage... It costs 2x the Antilop, and we're thinking about cutting our losses and buying the Antilop to replace it. You may be interested in the idea of just pulling your kid up to the table, but in the end you'll probably prefer a tray on the high chair to contain the mess.

Play Mat:

IKEA Leka Baby Gyms (Soft and Wooden): I recommend getting both. Dominic has LOVED the wooden one, and now that he is starting to walk, he will push it along the wood floors and pull up on it to play with the hanging toys from above. When he was younger he loved the soft baby gym at my parents' house. It was a nice pad to lay him on, easily machine washable, and the attached and removeable toys were very entertaining for him, the toy arch was also detachable if you just want to use it as a mat. To date, the wooden gym is one of Dominic's favorite toys, and it encourages gripping, exploration, mechanical thinking, and independence of movement (as an aid to standing and walking... it is very sturdy for only $25) We got a very expensive play mat at a shower, and wish we'd gotten 10 other things instead of that, since these were so good!

Changing Table:

• The top of a dresser with a changing pad. Easy if you have a short dresser. ... or...
• IKEA Spolling: Fold-up table with ample pocket storage. We LOVE this. It is easy to keep everything on hand, and if we were crunched for space, we could just fold it in half and stick it in a closet or against the wall, which will be nice for storing it in between babies.

Other Gear you will appreciate:

• Wipe Warmer: no cold hineys in the middle of the night... I thought this was silly until i put a cold wet wipe on a sleeping newborn's bottom... no fun.

• Munchkin Plastic Spoons: they hold more baby food than the standard coated metal spoons, and more importantly, the shape helps keep the food on the spoon while feeding! Mealtime is much cleaner now that we have these. They are available at most grocery stores.

• Wubba Nub Pacifier: If you plan to use a pacifier, this one is the hospital-issue soothie attached to a soft stuffed animal (almost like a beanie baby). It holds the pacifier in place for a newborn, and for older babies, gives them something to help grasp the pacifier to get it into the mouth. Pacimals is a similar product that has a removable pacifier, but it is much bigger than the Wubba Nub.

• Columbia Diaper Bag: Looks like a computer messenger bag... nice for dads to carry without looking totally metrosexual. It holds a ton of gear. Great for dropping off kids with a babysitter/grandma, or taking a kid to daycare. I'm moving out of the spit up and blow-out diaper stage, so I'm about to trade for one that just holds 2 diapers, wipes, and mom necessities (phone, wallet, etc), so it will be easier for me to manage on days I'm just making small trips, we'll hang onto the big one for Ryan and Nana to use.

And now in List Form, excluding the stuff we would have skipped on a second time around...

Columbia Diaper Bag

Wipe Warmer

Munchkin Spoons

IKEA Spolling Changing Table

IKEA Leka Baby Gym (Wooden, and Soft)

IKEA Antilop High Chair

Maxi Cosi Mico Infant Carrier

Maxi Cosi Perle Stroller

Amby Baby Bed

Matress for the Floor Bed (I know, it seems crazy)

ZoloWear Sling

In the words of one of my 5-yr-old students when I was leaving for maternity leave, "Happy Baby!"

Adventures of a Montessori Floor Bed

This afternoon was a momentous occasion for my faith in our Montessori floor bed.

For months now, Dominic has had the urge to start climbing the walls and crawling around as soon as we put him down to sleep on his floor bed. If we left him in the room awake, he would crawl out into the hallway fussing, until we would snap and go pick him up to try it again (over and over and over again). A huge hurdle was taking his door out of the attic and reattaching it to the hinge. For a couple weeks we've been able to rest easy that he won't be roaming the hallway after we leave his room. We still find ourselves slapping our foreheads when we step on a creaky board, awakening Dominic after 3o minutes of patting his back and returning us to square one for sleep time.

So this morning was no different for the morning nap. He had his bottle on his bed, turned onto his belly and started to crawl around on his bed (kind of like he's trying to get comfortable). I patted his back and tried to tiptoe out several times, each time stepping on a creaky board or awakening him by the door squeaking shut. Finally I was able to sneak out, close his door and make it down the hall without him waking up, and he took a decent morning nap.

This afternoon after he ate some delicious chicken soup mush (a la leftovers in a food processor), he was rubbing his eyes. I made his bottle, changed his diaper, put him on his bed with the bottle, returned his few toys to the shelf, straightened his blankets and sat with him while he finished his bottle. As soon as he finished the bottle he headed straight for his new stuffed bear by his shelf. I picked him and the bear up, and placed them both on his bed amidst the blankets. I turned and walked out of the room with him wide awake snuggling his bear.

Moments later he was fussing at his door, and before I could get up to comfort him, he was babbling away, crawling and playing in his room. I thought "clearly he is not yet tired, I misread the eye rubbing, I'll just let him play". Not thirty minutes later, his room was completely quiet. I walked down the hall to see if he'd fallen asleep on the hardwood floor or the shelf under the changing table. I peeked under the door to discover that he'd crawled back onto his bed and fallen asleep. EUREEKA!!

This is exactly what I've been waiting for. I knew that in theory he should be able to play in his room and go over to his bed when he's tired. In theory the play yard should be in its case in the top of the closet until we go on vacation to an un-baby-proofed place, but it is open and ready for action in his room. Today, though, rather than resorting to the play yard for containment when I was "positive that he was sleepy after one eye rub," I tested the theory, with certainty that Dominic was just going to miss his afternoon nap since he was so ready to play. Surprise! I was wrong, and now I'm listening to cars drive by blasting thumping latin music and the sounds of a quiet house with a sleeping baby! In theory I am taking down the play yard because of this awesome break-through, but I'll probably keep it up a few more days to test the theory a bit more.